Month: September 2008

Caught

So I have been in utter amazement the last couple weeks about how taken care of I am. Which is a weird thought seeing as I’m essentially “alone” in VA. Granted now three weeks in I feel like I have friends and people I can call if I need someone… (Like I did today with my broken car).. But, I think back to how everything has progressed and I am so blessed. God has been so good to me!

I moved and was very scared about how I would do. I mean I’ve always been fine in new situations, but I’ve never been in this type of situation where I knew NO ONE. So I moved and I began working at a place where I knew no one, I started attending a church where I knew no one, I started going to a Sunday school class where I knew no one, I went to a Bible study where again I knew no one, and I found an apartment with a girl I don’t know… That’s a lot of not knowing anyone!

But, then everyone I work with has begun taking care of me and stopping into my office to make sure I am adjusting well. Then I met several people from my Sunday school class that I sit with during church now. I have several people who actually seek me out to sit with me in Sunday school now. My bible study group is amazing and we plan things during the week to do together… and we laugh a lot and eat good food. And my apartment is beautiful, and my roommate is super nice and laid back.

Now I know people, and I am amazed at how easy this was. Granted it took work, I had to actually have the courage (or fake it like I did most of the time) to enter into one situation after another where I didn’t know who to look for, who to talk to, or what to do. And yet three weeks later somehow it all happened. I found a place I fit, not completely yet cause it takes time to completely fit… but I do fit here, and it’s weird.

People ask how I’m doing and I laugh because somehow after three weeks of living alone I’m still happy. I have yet to have the “oh crap what did I do” moment.. which I’m pretty sure is another God thing šŸ™‚

Be My Everything.

I heard this song Wednesday at church and although Iā€™d heard it before I was struck by how true it isā€¦ So I thought Iā€™d use it to show the truth in my own life. šŸ™‚

GOD IN MY LIVING
Every day I see little things that he does, the sunset that takes my breath away, the friend who calls to say they were thinking of me, the way everything has lined up perfectly without fail for everything here in VAā€¦
THERE IN MY BREATHING
Try once to pray without taking a deep breathā€¦ it doesnā€™t work, you canā€™t do it. If youā€™re serious about talking to your savior every time youā€™ll take a deep breath firstā€¦
GOD IN MY WAKING
I canā€™t remember any time in my life when I did not wake up and thank God for the day.. even when Iā€™m tired or donā€™t really want to go about my dayā€¦ but every morning I am thankfulā€¦ Itā€™s like waking up with the sunshine on your bed. J
GOD IN MY SLEEPING
I canā€™t count the number of times Iā€™ve fallen asleep prayingā€¦ and while Iā€™ve heard some people say thatā€™s a terrible thing to do, but why wouldnā€™t you want to fall asleep talking to the person who made you and saved you? Itā€™s like falling asleep with the assurance youā€™re bring watched over and protected.
GOD IN MY RESTING
Iā€™ve never experienced pure rest like that when Iā€™m praising him, and truly just sitting and being with him.
THERE IN MY WORKING
Some of my most meaningful work in my life has been the hardest times Iā€™ve ever worked, the most exhausting, the hardest emotionally, physically, and yet through it all I have been fulfilled and energized.
GOD IN MY THINKING
I donā€™t think I can say Iā€™ve ever heard Godā€™s voice, but I know there at times that when I was talking to myself something would suddenly pop into my head that would solve my problem, make something work out perfectly or would be one of those ā€œahaā€¦ duhā€ kind of things that you just know came out of no whereā€¦ thatā€™s my God.
GOD IN MY SPEAKING
Once I spoke to some of my teens, and I know it wasnā€™t me speaking because I donā€™t remember what I said.. but they listened intently the entire time.. no one talked (YOU talk to 50 teens without them talking.. haha yeah right!).. and no one fell asleep (which was the only time the entire week on the missions trip. Itā€™s like knowing youā€™re saying what needs to be said.. but not being prepared ahead of time for whatā€™s coming out of your mouth.

CHORUS:

BE MY EVERYTHING
How could you not want him to be your everything when things are just different when he is interwoven with it all?
BE MY EVERYTHING
Thereā€™s something freeing about knowing itā€™s not you.
BE MY EVERYTHING
Not one time in my life have I ever wished Iā€™d done it differently when I let God take over.
BE MY EVERYTHING
Itā€™s like allowing him to take creditā€¦ and blame (if there ever would be).. which is liberating.

VERSE 2:
GOD IN MY HOPING
If all things truly are possible.. then hoping becomes something exciting and promising.
THERE IN MY DREAMING
Every dream Iā€™ve ever had that I truly became excited and pumped about down in my heart has not only come true (so far.. minus a few that Iā€™m waiting for the right timing)
GOD IN MY WATCHING
Watch a small child love, laugh, pray, sleepā€¦ and youā€™ll feel it in your heart.
GOD IN MY WAITING
This is by far the hardest for me to do.. (any wonders as to why here?).. But, not one time have I regretted waitingā€¦ I just forget to remind myself of that fact in the moment šŸ˜‰

GOD IN MY LAUGHING
Some of my favorite memories have been laughing for hours with others who truly love my sweet savior too. Thereā€™s something that makes the experience relaxing and energizing.
THERE IN MY WEEPING
I have hurt deeply when I didnā€™t understand why someone had to die, and the only thing that I could think or pray was ā€œGod help meā€ and slowly over time Iā€™ve always felt his peace.
GOD IN MY HURTING
I always forget to FIRST go to God when Iā€™m hurting, but once I do I know deep down in my heart that this too shall pass.
GOD IN MY HEALING
Looking back on the various things Iā€™ve felt I needed to heal fromā€¦ I cherish the road that it took for me to get to what I feel is true healing.

BRIDGE:

CHRIST IN ME
If you can get through everything Iā€™ve said previously and not feel Christ in you.. youā€™re broken.
CHRIST IN ME
I feel Christ in me every day, in moments when I am encouraging others.
CHRIST IN ME THE HOPE OF GLORY

The fact that I have Christ means I have hope.
BE MY EVERYTHING
Iā€™m not sure how after looking at all of this he COULDNā€™T be your everythingā€¦

Amusing moments

I was talking with my mom last night and I was recounting various amusing moments that have happened to me in the week in a half that I’ve been in VA.

I find it interesting how little things can mean so much to me, like “making friends” with a mattress sales man who is bored out of his mind. Or joining a small group and having them be amazed at my “braveness” for moving to a place I know no one… which seems to be the common consensus from everyone I’ve met. Or even the ladies I work with listening with delight as I detail out my search for apartments, mattress shopping, and trying to figure out how to cook for one.. and find my way around the new city I live in.. All of these things are relatively small and insignificant, but I find myself thinking about them later and smiling or laughing at a specific incident. And, I must admit I love those little things šŸ™‚ I love surprising people, or pushing past the nervousness that everyone feels about walking into a room with a dozen people you don’t know.. and then acting like it’s no big deal.

I’ve found that even though I get pretty nervous going to Sunday school with people I’ve never met or seen before, meeting someone who could potentially be my roommate or hanging out with a co-worker and their friends over pizza and a movie.. I’m finding that it’s interesting because each time if I adopt the attitude of “it’s not a big deal, and it’ll be ok” then offer a quick prayer for God to help things go smoothly.. then everything goes better than I could have imagined… Isn’t that such a wonderful thing about God? šŸ™‚ I love it!

šŸ™‚

ps I’m moving into my new place in a little over a week!

Alone but not Lonely

It’s really weird for me to be spending to so much time alone, yet not be lonely at all. I’m so thankful for the summer I had, and all the time I had that really helped me learn to at least appreciate my alone time. Since I now live alone (at least for a little while) I have the evenings to spend by myself, although I tend to keep myself busy enough by random things that I don’t actually just sit at home. I’ve found that I really enjoy being around people, but not actually with people… like being in public where there are people around, but not actually with them.

I went to church alone last night for only the second time in my entire life. It was a great sermon, and the music was good enough. The church was GINORMOUS though, which I enjoyed being able to blend in the crowd… I am very excited about the church, but intend on getting to know the leadership before I commit to the church fully.

I also have found that I decently enjoy the 45 minute drive to work and home. The road is hilly and curvy enough to be interesting šŸ™‚

I am happy, and slowly finding my way around. And I am excited about my job and the things they have me doing. My first day was way less stressful than I expected it to be. *whew*