Regrowing

ˌrēˈɡrō/ verb/ gerund or present participle: Regrowing "to grow or be grown anew or continued growth after an injury or after having died or withered"

Oh, Boys…

I was chatting with one of my best friends today, and we were doing the normal girl talk.. joking about who our future husbands were, and what our lives would be like.. We get a kick out of making the other one’s story more ridiculous than they made our story… Which got me thinking…

Where is my heart right now on this topic?.. Praise Jesus not where it has been in the past! I am totally content with my life (which is not to say I do not have hard days/weeks etc..). When I look at my life, there are, and will always be things I “wish” I could remove from it.. but, in all honesty, there is not really anything that is glaring enough that it causes major discontentment at all. In fact I love my life, I love how busy I am, the insane pace I keep, I do not mind that I might have to work to fit people into my life.. but I have no real reason to complain at all…

I go to 3 Bible studies a week, and church twice a week. I go dancing most Fridays, and mix the rest of my free time with leaders meetings, working out, friends, and random trips or things I really should do (like laundry)…

So, why do I feel like this is important to point out?..

Because, all of these little things add to why I am really not interested in a relationship right now. Not to say I will never want one, but right now it just seems like a lot of work, and potential drama that I just do not have the time or energy to deal with. My focus is elsewhere. SOMEDAY, I would love to find a guy, have him pursue me, fall in love, get married, have a family, and spend our life serving our Savior. But, that time is not now, I am content to grow and move… while learning to be dependent on my Savior alone. I have things I still need to work on in my own life and heart before I can even think of focusing on someone else… Jesus and I are working a lot still, slowly, but steadily.

Despite the numerous times a week I get asked if I like someone or if I am dating someone (which I do not and am not), I am really just living life.. NOT planning anything. I have no ulterior motives, and have made an effort to be clear about my actions simply being a result of who I am, not what I am trying to accomplish.

To be fair, none of this is a slam or anything towards any guy… it is not my way of subtly saying “I don’t like you.” And, this is not a vow of singleness for however long for whatever reason… It is simply where I am at right now. Are there exceptions?.. sure. Is there a guy I “like?” No.. No guys are pursuing, so my current feelings of contentment where I am right now is perfect for me 🙂 How would I react if a guy started pursuing?.. No idea, it would totally depend on the guy… If he intrigues me then I will be open and probably really excited and scared at the same time about it..

But, right now. I enjoy where I am… Which is as single as they come 🙂

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This entry was posted on October 29, 2009 by in Guys, Singleness.
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