Hands down I would say one of the key crappy things about my situation is the severe lack of a the ability to verbally process like I typically need to.
The actual main crappy thing is the constant and intense pressure from the evil one.
As much as I would love to spout off about the situations going on in great detail, that is one of my key rules, not writing when I am angry or naming specific people involved in situations… Keeps me in check, and from saying things I do not actually mean… Or might actually mean. But, in either case, it prevents me from hurting others, and helps keep me from burning bridges.
But, today, and even last week I am extremely angry at the way fear controls people. No matter what name you want to put on it or what method is used to rationalize it, at the core it is still fear.
I know that everyone is subject to fear, that sometimes it seems like the only option is to do whatever will make the fear go away. I know that there have been times in my life where the fear has just been so overwhelming that I have no answers and have no control.. and that just makes it worse.
In some cases fear is healthy and protects you from doing something stupid.. Or at least acts as a flare gun to highlight something that needs attention.
But, sometimes fear is just because we are not in control, cannot see what is coming, and dislike both situations.
What I also know is that fear isn’t supposed to control us. I know that sometimes fear is actually the worst thing we could use as a guide. And, I know that when fear is not addressed, confronted, and a solution is not sought after, other people begin to be affected by our own fear.
Tonight, I hate fear because it’s causing nothing but stress, frustration, relational tension, aggravation, and making me want to high-five a few people in the face…
See? Not helpful.
“There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.” – 1 John 4:18
“If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal.
2 If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing.
3 If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast,but do not have love, I gain nothing.
4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.
5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.
6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.
7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.” – 1 Corinthians 13:1-7